The other day one of my good friends was saying she doesn't feel that close to me anymore because I spend most of my time shooting and she doesn't want to shoot, or vintage collecting with Beck. She went on to call me materialistic basically and saying thats why we aren't as close.
That fucking sucks to be told. She went on to say how she didn't mean it like that but it still stuck with me. It kind of made me thing about how kind of sad my life is. I don't have anyone but Beck and I don't have anything but KitschCake and my vintage. I don't have a boyfriend to invest my time in. All I have is my things. Which is extremely sad to say the least. Like when my friends are out hanging out with their significant others I am at GoodWill or the thrift shop alone.
But I totally have to defend my sad lifestyle. I'm 18 and I've been running my own business for almost a year. My whole business, other than actually shooting, is based off of thrifting and networking. I need to get out there meet people, shake hands, kiss babies etc, like I am running for some sort of Pretty Office. Like this weekend I went to Three different Nick Curan and the Lowlifes shows in three different states( the shows were amazing! See them if you have the chance) I ended up having to skip out on a vacation with my high school friends(which they cut a day shorter and that inspired my not going) and now most of them aren't talking to me.(How extremely high school right?) But I had to get out there and meet people who enjoy like things. I went to a show in Boston and met some new potential clients, then went to Rhode Island and bonded with some old clients along with making new friends. Sunday night I went up to Portland, Maine and kept up with the theme of the weekend. I woke up to angry texts because I went to Maine instead of Cape Cod. My friends don't understand that I have a business to run and responsibilities to attend to. I have to come put with abut $240 a month just for bills(which is a lot for having a mall job that just pays for the gas to get to it and maybe a couple GoodWill purchases) and None of those bills are for school. SO throw that on there at a later date. But am changing phones and getting a iPhone in the near future(which is about $100 a month if I do, do it opposed to paying nothing right now) and my car insurance is about $115. (which leaves me an extra $25 for emergencies...or dinner out) Pretty much I need to get the KitschCake name out there so I can make money to pay for these things. My friends don't understand. Boo-hoo. whoa is me. blah blah blah.
WOAH. SOrry about the on vintage related posted.
Aw Shane its ok.Honestly a lot of it has to do with your age too.Its a big transition in life being 18,you're going to see a lot of friends come and go as you all find your way in your new years of adult life.
ReplyDeleteI don't know you but I feel your pain! You know you're different to your old friends and that can be lonely but you know what you'll meet more amazing people who are 'different' and you'll feel so much closer to them. Art Deco Dame is right being 18 sucks sometimes, it's a horrible transition time. Stick in there kid!
ReplyDeleteJust want to let you know I did loads of things on my own when I was your age cos I figured if others didn't want to do them with me I'll do them myself! I even went to Paris on my own - I'm from the UK so it's not too far but still a big thing - I loved it and don't regret this time 'on my own' at all looking back on it although I know at the time there were lonely times.
Get your revenge too ;)
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ReplyDeleteFriends are all about quality, not quantity. Sounds like the quality in your part of the world is what is lacking. Don't be too hard on yourself...18-21 are huge transition years and I know it sucked to hear it at 18, but things will change and they will get better and there are way better people out there than those you know from high school.
ReplyDeleteAs for the hipster comment, I got 6 years on you and I wonder about all these "kids" now into vintage stealing my deals...how do you think Mary Deluxe and Coedith must feel as they've been at it upwards of 20 years?! ;)
I have to agree with the other comments. You're going to find that friends cycle in and out of your life throughout the years. We all change as we grow in our lives and as we age. Why, I'm not friends with a single person that I went to high school with - because we no longer have anything in common. We've all evolved in different directions.
ReplyDeleteThere comes a time when a lot of us realize that friendships have to be weeded out - I'm not saying that you wouldn't help these people out if they ever really need you. I'm saying that we all have to sometimes take a good hard look at what people are adding to the joy in our lives and people are sapping our time and happiness.
A lot of your friends and acquaintances are still young and far away from trying to start a professional career or from following a set dream. You came into your own early and need to follow your path. Those who can walk along with you will. Those who can't, won't. It'll all be okay. I promise you. :)
Real friends will always be happy for you and stand behind you...and will want for you what you truly want for yourself. And it's true that there is nothing wrong with doing things alone. I do most of my hobbies and interests alone. If nothing else, you know that you'll always be in good company. :) Oh, and note that sometimes, people will be secretly jealous of how focused you are because they haven't found focus yet.
Anyway, Go get em, tiger! If you don't try your hardest, you'll only regret it when you're old.
Oh, and you made me laugh SO hard about the "hipsters". What I find laughable (thank god or I'd be in tears instead) is that when I stand side by side with them in the thrift stores, going through merchandise, a lot of them seem to put off this air of importance as if, "yes..I am standing in this dusty corner, staring at this grungy vintage item but I am SO IMPORTANT!" I've had some of those folks not even speak to me when I try to talk to them. I hope it soon fades. Being an old time vintage collector, I know that a lot of the people who collect things for themselves do it out of a love for history and the past...and out of a love for a time when for god's sake, people would talk to each other in public! Sooner or later, the trend will pass and they'll be out of the market. :)
I do sell vintage from my own ridiculously overwhelmed collection but I also grab some things from the thrifts. Gotta pay that electric bill! I do leave lots there for the collectors as well though.
p.s. It makes me giggle when the hipster kids wear their sunglasses inside of the stores as if they are about to be discovered by the paparazzi!
THANK YOU EVERYONE!
ReplyDeleteI really appreciate the time all of you took to tell me everything you did. I'm feeling much better about the whole situation.
As for hipsters, Eartha you are so right! I know the air of importance you talk about.